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If you're looking for a great way to show off how holier than thou you are this Lent, why not give up reading my emails until Easter Sunday? Just chuck 'em right into the old trash! 

(Don't unsubscribe without contemplating the mental image of me sitting there, right after I get the notification of your abandonment, alone in the dark, a trembling razor blade poised just over the pulsing underside of my despairing wrist! OK?)

You know that these Tony Patti emails are your greatest terrestrial pleasure, don't you? Show all the Christians you know what a real Christian gives up for Lent, and watch them all squirm in anticipation of the eternal fires of Hell that surely await them!

How much do you want an EVE ARDEN doormat? Sublimely ridiculous!

A classic of floating photo head design!

The Fambly

Over the years I've played around with the idea of the family comic, the most popular kind of strip known to man. Mostly because I loved the idea of the beleaguered housewife stereotype, which I myself have become.

Here below is something I have never done before or since, a color comic.
"God, aliens are much dumber than on TV!"
--Steve Pick
From my Introduction to Hard Knocks, Vol. II:

I’m always writing this stuff in tiny books. This time I’m going to be a bit clearer and actually communicate something.

This is all just to leave a little something behind in the general detritus of civilization, to mark the by now mundane brain-to-brain spark of discernment, to while away the hours when I should have been in bed, and why aren’t I?

Decode the type, unravel the brain, merge memories with me. 
Words, words, words. I don’t think too often with words. Some of my profoundest thoughts are completely, necessarily wordless. But when I bother to think in words, when I make the effort, I want to write them down. I don’t want to waste them. In this sense I don’t think that I’m different from other people for thinking mostly without words, but maybe I’m different from other people because I hate to waste words when I do.

It’s only when you self consciously seek to do it that you think in words. When you say to yourself, “What am I thinking? What am I going to say tomorrow to so-and-so? What am I thinking now?”  But when you’re really thinking, usually you’re just looking at something blankly and little things stream through your mind without grammatical sentences. Sometimes words will pop up in their proper places, but most of the time, let’s face it, you don’t need words when an image or an emotion or a memory is there, at your fingertips, in the infinity of your mind.

Why think of a noun when you can see it in your head? Why think of a verb when you can visualize the action, or feel the results or the initiatives without it? And as for prepositions and articles, what are they even for? Only formalities, for books. 

So when I think of the past, and want to capture it in a self-referential form, I do it with words. And when I think of words, I just hate to waste them.
If you happen to think of any catty remarks about this email, REPLY! See if you can make me cry! (Spoiler: That's super easy!)
DC Comics Fun!
Remember when DC Comics were the fun comics and not the horrific dystopian nightmare brand they have become?

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