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May's Mantra:

I am showing love for myself by knowing that I have the power to change and that my change can be powerful. 



Dear Loved Ones,

 

I have always felt like big things transform us. Whether its big love, big moments, big breakups, big friendships, big jobs, big loss, big injustices, big life events, big world events, or big a-ha moments.  When something big happens, we are not the same person we were before.  

 

When I had my daughter Memphis, I struggled to feel like myself after. It wasn’t until a friend of mine who is also a mother said, 

 

“The trick is, you have to stop trying to be the person you were before you had a child.” 

 

Damn. She was right. Becoming a parent is a big thing! How could I have thought something so big wouldn’t change me? I wasn’t struggling because I felt different, I was struggling because I was wrestling with an old reality.

 

Instead of going with the flow of my transformation, I was fighting against it.

 

I was trying to work, think, plan, and feel the way I felt before I took on the huge responsibility of becoming a mother. 

 

And it was definitely not working or making me feel good. 

 

So I took my friend’s advice and also began to be a little more gentle with my new self.  

 

There is nothing wrong with me, I am just changing. It is uncomfortable at times but I can handle uncomfortable.

 

Instead of being rigid and hard on myself, I try to be patient, compassionate, and open to the newness of my life’s changes. 

 

This pandemic is one of the biggest things we will ever go through together globally. It’s massive. And it is changing us. It will change the way we gather, travel, work, see our friends, and raise our families. It will change the way we will need to care for and consider our elders, incarcerated people, displaced homeless people, and community members living in poverty. 

 

I recently discovered that the moments I feel the most fatigued and helpless, are when I am grappling with the way things were before COVID-19. I am the most defeated when I am in a state of wishing for that old reality.  

 

On the flip side, I find that the moments I feel the most okay (not good, just okay) are when I try to be patient, compassionate, and open to living in a changed world as a changed person. 

 

I don’t have the answer for how we will get through this period. But I do know that we are built to be able to adapt and change. We are built to be able to evolve and have generationally found ways to meet big problems with big solutions.  And more than anything we are resilient beings.  As my friend Glennon says, “we can do hard things” and change is hard but we can do that too. 

 

I love you,

 

Cleo


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